What I realized during my darkest hours. :)

I recently found this picture of my nephew in my brother's laptop... and kinda reminds me of how I used to be as a kid...

Now, I know I've been down in the dumps for the past few days--because of what happened to my supposedly realized dream of becoming a doctor-- but then I realized, how stupid I was to fall into the pits of DESPAIR. Literally.

I did cry a lot... nah. I cried for DAYS! Ha! I tried consoling with icecream but that didn't really help... but then, just as I was about to think that ALL HOPE WAS LOST... I found this.

Yes yes, it's just a picture of a child picking out stuff from the floor (and probably eat some of it) but it made me feel something... something different. It made me realize that "GOD! I HAVEN'T GROWN UP AT ALL!!"

Yes, i did mature... physically and in some aspects, intellectually.. but holistically?? I don't think so... see, I used to be the free spirited, not-capable-of-staying-perfectly-still-in-a-chair, almost ADHD type of person... but now, I guess I'm not anymore. Yeah, that should have been the case, considering I am a degree holder, and a licensed one at that, but come to think of it, there still is some good in bringing out the child in ourselves...

I used to recall when I was young, I couldn't wait till I was big and mature to do all those stuff that my mom, dad and my elder brother did.. but when I was realizing what I wanted to do then, I realized how I wanted to be younger again and NOT do all these things that they did...

I realized that there is some truth in the words When life gives you lemons, you make a lemonade and I believe that with this truth and these realizations, I'd be able to emancipate myself from all these miseries...

Acting out as a mature man and profiling oneself as one, may put you on the status quo, but nonetheless, NEVER forget that you were once a child and that you did have dreams of your own..

Now that I am presented with this reality, why not make the most out of it? And like a child, why not dream BIG again? Who knows, it may turn out for the better, if not for the best. :)

All this time I thought I could never dream and hope again... but God indeed has His ways, and now I know which path I am heading... Hey I'm still 23, and yes I'm still young... I won't die any minute from now... And I don't believe that 2012 is the end of the world.. so there is still time for me to be a doctor... yes there's still time to make dreams into reality.

Now I have to live up to my reality, and make my dreams come true. :)

smiling now.

with eager heart.

dreaming big.

harvii. :)