sick. tired. alone.

I'm sick... again.
I can't really count the times where I've been faced with these kinds of situation...
To the point where I think I'm becoming more and more adept at handling these instances.
Although at a vantage point, these experiences make me understand my body more.
It makes me feel that I still have a purpose to live and a life to pursue.

I'm sick, tired and weak.
Thanks to my friends who look out for me, and care for me (even when we don't actually see each other).
But knowing that somewhere, in their busy hours, they still have time to wish me good health and give me high hopes of me getting all better... this then, makes me feel that I am a person worthy of love and of compassion.
Friends... you made me a strong person.
Thank you.

I'm sick, tired, weak and alone.
I've been with the company of my family and friends for the longest time... but being sick and feeling alone, all at the same time, is really different.
I have nobody but myself to comfort with.
I have nobody to care but myself.
I am alone. And I understand that.
Some say, that one should wait for the right person to come... but when he comes, will he be that person who'll take care of you when you're sick?
Our soulmates may not necessarily be our partners.
and our partners may not necessarily be our soulmates.
but then again, why do we still believe in such concepts?
and in the end, it all boils down to you, taking care of yourself.

This made me cry.
Knowing that I'm alone, not because I needed to, but because I chose to.
I don't know if I should ever love again.
And if I do, will he reciprocate the kind of love that I am willing to offer? or will it be, yet again, a one-sided love affair... wherein one loves the other, and the other loves another.

I'm sick...
I'm tired...
I'm alone...
wtf?!

Hope I'll be better when I wake up.